A Letter to My Children: What I Hope You Learn from My Healing
“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.”
Healing isn’t easy, but it’s necessary.
I never imagined I’d be starting my latest blog post this way. But here I am—writing from a place of surrender, strength, and self-awareness.
A few weeks back, I hit rock bottom. I’d done everything I could to stay strong, but my spirit was completely drained. The final straw? A disappointing day in court. It was like the system failed me again, leaving me feeling vulnerable.
I lashed out.
Not at the person who caused the pain, but at someone who didn’t deserve it.
And afterward, I sat alone in my living room for hours, questioning if I even deserved to be here.
But then I chose something different.
I chose help. I chose additional trauma-based therapy.
Breaking the stigma starts at home. This clip dives into how therapy can transform households by fostering trust, healing, and open conversations. It's time to bring mental health out of the shadows—because every family deserves a chance to heal.
A soft acknowledgment: How trauma shaped me as a mother.
For a long time, I survived things that no woman—no person—should ever have to endure. As a domestic violence survivor, there are pieces of me that have had to be rebuilt over and over again. And while I’ve done everything in my power to protect my children from the harshest parts of that experience, the truth is: trauma echoes. Sometimes it slips into the way I react. Sometimes it disguises itself as emotional exhaustion, or as silence when they need presence.
But please understand:
I have never stopped loving them.
Even when I was breaking, they were my reason to keep going.
This healing journey isn’t just about overcoming the past. It’s about unlearning behaviors shaped by fear.
It’s about creating a home that feels emotionally safe, even when mine didn’t.
It’s about making sure that the pain I endured doesn’t become their inheritance.
And that? That’s the root of this entire journey.
Why I decided to seek additional support
That night, I realized that while I had been managing everything on the surface—parenting, working, surviving—I needed more. I needed support. I needed tools. I needed space to breathe and heal without shame.
So I said yes to a new level of care.
And it’s one of the best decisions I’ve made—not just for myself, but for my children.
What Healing is teaching me (a few weeks in)
It’s been a few weeks since I started this deeper healing journey, and here’s what I know:
Healing is not a straight line—it’s layered, tender, and often uncomfortable.
Slow progress is still progress.
Giving grace to yourself is just as important as giving it to others.
Most importantly? You don’t have to do it alone.
There’s something powerful about sharing space with others who are hurting, but still choose to show up and do the work. That kind of courage has reminded me of what’s possible.
What I’m learning about myself
I’m learning that I made the right choice.
That seeking support isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.
That I deserve to heal, even if others never acknowledge the harm they caused.
And I’m learning that my healing is not just for me—it’s for my kids, too.
To my Children: This is I want you to remember
My heart overflows with love for Hazel, David, and Tierra—my greatest blessings gathered here in faith and family. ❤️ #ForeverGrateful #ChurchFamily
Dear David, Hazel, and Tierra,
I need you to know that Mommy is trying. Really trying.
Not just to survive—but to thrive.
I want you to remember:
It’s okay to ask for help.
It’s okay to feel your feelings.
It’s okay to walk away from what breaks you.
If there’s ever been a time you didn’t feel emotionally safe with me, I need you to know—it was never your fault. It’s because I was still learning how to create safety for myself. But that cycle?
It ends with me.
This journey I’m on? It’s for all of us.
Legacy lessons I want to leave with you
When life gets hard—and I promise, it will—I want you to hear my voice in the back of your mind, reminding you:
💚 This too shall pass.
💚 Faith without works is dead.
💚 And healing is holy.
I’m doing the work now so that you won’t have to carry the same burdens I did. I want to be the example you can look back on and say, “My mom didn’t give up.”
Even when it was hard. Even when it was messy. Even when no one clapped for her.
She. Kept. Going.
Final thoughts from a healing heart
I may not have all the answers, but I have the will to keep walking.
And that’s more than enough.
To anyone reading this who feels like they’re barely holding it together—please know:
You are not alone. Asking for help is a brave and beautiful act.
You don’t have to stay stuck.
You can trust again.
You can rebuild.
You can heal.
Just like I’m doing.
I am eager to explore the complicated journey of trusting despite trauma with all of you.
“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace… will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”
